Leave the Girl Alone

     "Come, Miss Hale - come, my dear! You must not give way, or where shall we all be? There is not another person in the house fit to give a direction of any kind, and there is so much to be done. There's who's to manage the funeral; and who's to come to it; and where it's to be; and all to be settled: and Master Fredrick's like one crazed with crying, and master never was a good one for settling; and, poor gentleman, he goes about now as if he were lost. It's bad enough, my dear, I know; but death comes to us all; and you're well off never to have lost any friend till now."

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 Elizabeth Gaskell's North and South, Volume 2 ch. 31 (pg) 247

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      Oh my gosh! She just lost her mother! She just lost her best (only) friend! What are you talking about, saying she's not lost people before? She had to leave all her friends and her home to be dragged out here to the North! She has had way to much pressure keeping secrets from her father and trying to comfort everyone and run everything. How dare you! Leave her alone! You, having conspired with her mother to keep secrets from her, should be ashamed of yourself. Telling Margret that she should be thankful, you should do something helpful for once. Grow up you hypocrite!

Poor Poor Women

     "My dear Lizzy, do not give way to such feelings as these. They will ruin your happiness. You do not make allowance enough for difference of situation and temper. Consider Mr. Collins's respectability, and Charlotte's prudent, steady character. Remember that she is one of a large family; that as to fortune, it is a most eligible match; and be ready to believe, for every body's sake, that she may feel some regard and esteem for our cousin."

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 Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, Volume 2 ch. 1 (pg) 133

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      I really pity the women during the time of Jane Austen's era. Sure they lived when life seemed a bit more simple and elegant, but in the case of ladies like Charlotte, living with a large, poor family, they spent the first twenty years of their lives worrying whether they could find a man who would ever consider marrying them. Being plain and not having much to tempt anyone, the girl would have to jump at catching the first man, no matter what his age or looks, who could give her a place to live and relieve her family of her burdensome existence. If they were never truly loved or never truly loved the one they married, that was simply something  they had to deal with. Marrying Mr. Collins, Charlotte had to convince herself that she was luckier than most in her position, for at least he "loved" her.